S.A.D. BASTARD

Fucking hell, autumns coming, isn't it. I can feel it prodding and cackling as it steadily scares off the meek, fleeting and elusive beast that is our summertime.

The nights are drawing in. There's a chill in the air in the evenings. The early hints of that moist, fuggy feeling are apparent. And to follow will be winter with it's bitter, dark, all-encompassing stranglehold of miserable cold and starkness.

Things are slowing down and soon we'll be on pause. For months. Yes, all seasons apart from Spring and Summer are fucking shit.

"But autumns so beautiful!"

True, but its also dark and wet.

"ahh, winter's so cosy!"

So's a campfire on the beach until the sun comes up (at 4am instead of bloody 7am)

I emplore you all to burn tyres, drench yourself in aerosol deodorants, drive everywhere and indulge in other such 'environmentally irresponsible' behaviour in order to speed up global warming and bless our isle with a state of constant summer.